For the past months, I’ve been a lurker of different blogs pertaining to life, personal development,home stuff and other inspirational topics. It’s been a  routine for me to read at least one article. Amidst all the chaos at home and work, this new past time of mine is one of the reason that keeps me sane (aside from my family,friends, GOD etc). Somehow I learn something from different people and from their different perspective.

I came across this article from one of my favorite sites, and I want to share it to others.

(an excerpt from an article at the bridgemaker blogsite)

“We can always choose to perceive things differently. You can focus on what’s wrong in your life or you can focus on what’s right.”  – Marianne Williamson

10 Steps for Transforming Negative Thoughts into Positive Beliefs by Alex Blackwell

We have the ability to create our own reality. For the most part, we can look at a situation and see the good or we can look at the same situation and choose to see the bad. Often times the lens we use to view what’s happening is filtered by our thoughts.

Positive thoughts create more positive circumstances. Alternatively, negative thoughts contribute to feelings of dissatisfaction and disappointment. Therefore, changing our negative thoughts is essential to achieve happiness and peace.

The following are the most common negative thinking behaviors. Becoming aware of these is essential to transforming negative thoughts into positive beliefs.

  1. Stay away from “all-or-nothing” thinking. When we slip into “all-or-nothing” thinking we see our circumstances as either black or white with not much in between. By shifting to someplace in the gray, a fresh perspective is created that helps us to realize more options do exist.
  2. Avoid the temptation to over generalize. Overgeneralization is best characterized when we believe if one bad thing happens, then everything else is doomed to go poorly.
  3. What you rather be right or happy?I can be very stubborn. At times my stubbornness has cost me. It has caused me to miss the opportunity to accept an apology or consider a different point-of-view. I was more determined to be right than to be happy.The need to be right cultivates more negative thoughts because of our unwillingness to let go of whatever the issue was in the first place. To find some peace and happiness, sometimes we just need to let it go.
  4. Change your mental filter.Persistent pessimism can develop into a habit if we are not careful. Left unattended, chronic negative thinking can begin to shape the way we see the world. The glass will always be half-empty.
  5. Watch your tendency for jumping to conclusions.When confronted with what might appear to be an unwelcomed circumstance, consider taking a deep breath; a full step back, to look at the event at a more holistic level in order to get all of the information.
  6. Don’t should on yourself. When we should on ourselves we are issuing negative judgments about our actions and behaviors.
  7. Be aware of emotional reasoning. Not many of us are like the character Spock from Star Trek who is consistently logical and rational no matter the circumstance. Even though we often have a rational response to a difficult event, we also have a tendency to slip into emotional reasoning when confronted with an especially challenging situation.Just because we are experiencing a certain uncomfortable emotion doesn’t mean our character, our soul, has been downgraded. It just means for that moment, in that small space of time, we feel a certain way about ourselves.When we allow ourselves to be human and give our spirit the grace and mercy it deserves, we are in a better position to reframe self-limiting thoughts and keep them from manifesting to the point they begin to define who we are.
  8. Try not to take everything personally. It may be hard to hear, but not everything is about you and not everything is about me, either. Fear, paranoia and perhaps a measure of insecurity can lead us to believe the way other people react, or the things they say, are directed to us. Sometimes people are insensitive, judgmental or just plain in a bad mood.
  9. Dial back from magnifying a problem.There is perception and then there is reality. Our negative thoughts start to churn when we confuse the two.Seeing a situation for what it really is, instead of what it feels like can help us stay grounded. Magnifying a problem only gives the problem more energy and provides the opportunity for the situation to become larger than it was ever intended to be.
  10. Celebrate.Celebrate the good things when they happen. Don’t simply dismiss them or minimize them.There is no question some days have a few setbacks, a couple of obstacles and sometimes pain. There are even some days when we feel as though someone has emptied our hearts of the passion and strength we need for life. So, on the days we are blessed and have positive things happen, no matter how small and insignificant they may seem, allow yourself the time to enjoy them and then be filled back up by them.

    Like attracts like. Positive thoughts and happiness create more of the same.